Like most of you I grew up thinking that as long as I was honest, worked hard and always tried to do the right thing my life would be wonderful.  Whenever things would go wrong I would spent many hours trying to figure out what I did wrong. Every time someone would do something mean or horrible to me I would spend days trying to figure out what I did to deserve that kind of treatment.  Lets just say if I had a dollar for every time I said, “WOW that is really unfair” I would be a millionaire!

It is funny because now that I am on the other side of all the trauma and drama in my life people constantly tell me how lucky I am and how they wish they were me.  They tell me how they wish their lives were as easy as mine. Really? So many people that know me now were not there through, what I refer to now as, the transitional years.  They weren’t there for all the battles, all the losses, all the taking the high road and all that had to get left behind. Lucky? Easy? My life has not been either of those two.

The truth is I was never able to answer all those question (what was I doing wrong, what did I do to deserve being treated so poorly, why was life so unfair).  The truth is I just realized that life is not meant to be fair or easy! Once I realized that, my entire life started to change! I saw the bad things that were happening around me not as a punishment but as a road sign telling me it was time to move on in a new direction.  When people would do mean things I stopped asking why and started focusing on why I was allowing it. I started realizing that I actually had a lot more power than I ever realized! While I could not control everything happening around me I absolutely could control how I allowed things to affect me.  It wasn’t a punishment, I wasn’t unlucky, I wasn’t doing anything so horribly wrong! It was just life!! Life is not easy and it isn’t always fair! That is just life!

Everyone is so busy looking for this big secret in life!  There is not secret. It is just life. Life is up and down.  Life is sometimes great and sometimes it brings you to your knees.  So stop racking your brain and for heaven sake stop trying to figure out why horrible people do horrible things.  Stop getting caught in the circle of drama and start focusing on who you are and what you want. Stop letting other people decide your fate, your happiness and your WORTH.  Life is not fair and that is okay. You are okay. You are better than okay…you are pretty fantastic! So go be you!