WOW! 51! I can not believe I am turning 51! I am not sure how 51 is suppose to feel but I have to tell you I don’t feel much different than 31 or 41. Am I doing it right? Am I doing it wrong? Should I be depressed that I am getting old? Am I getting old? Isn’t 50 the new 30? I think that is what people say to make you feel better (since they all ASSUME that everyone has a problem getting older)? I don’t think I have a problem getting older. In fact, I think Kyle will tell you I probably need to tone it down a bit when it comes to my Birthday month excitement!
While I may not feel different I will tell you what I do notice changing, my patience! I no longer have time, patience or the need to allow negativity in my life. I am no longer “putting up” with people (ya know the who cause chaos in your life and than act like you are the problem when you stand up for yourself). I am no longer feeling the need to allow people to vomit their hate and anger on me. I find myself fed up a lot lately. Just the tone of the world in general seems absolutely insane to me. It seems everyone is in everyone else’s business and I just don’t get it! Maybe in a way I am jealous because I have always been so busy helping people and creating my dreams that I have never had time to be worried about what everyone else is doing. Maybe I wish I had the emotional disconnect to just not care about how other’s feel? I don’t know maybe life is easier that way. I guess if you are always worrying about what everyone else is doing you never have to look at yourself! Hummmm???????
As I get older I realize that it isn’t about being right or even having other’s understand your point of view. Honestly it is more about understanding yourself! Boy that can be a real tough one! As I continue on this wonderful and sometimes insane journey called life I have learned a few key things:
- It isn’t all about me
Everyone is living their own experiences. We are all just a reflection to each other. Sometimes people do things to us and it has absolutely NOTHING to do with us. They are simply transferring their other issues onto us for whatever reason (and let me tell you there can be a million different reasons). This can be very difficult if we are always trying to understand “what did I do” or “why did they do that to me”. Truth is it has NOTHING to do with you. - It is all about ME
At the end of the day I AM in complete control of my happiness! WOW that was a tough one to learn! It is one of those GREAT NEWS/BAD NEWS things! The great news is you can change your life the minute you decide to do so. The bad news is that you are also responsible for the things you are continuing to allow in your life! UGH! - Always best to just STOP talking
I think those of you who do know me can probably guess this was nearly impossible for me to learn (still working on it)! LOL! Honestly, it was a very important thing for me to learn and master. I think we always want people to understand where we are coming from, why we are saying or acting a certain way and why we feel a certain way. I have truly learned that sometimes that is the exact thing that keeps us in negativity and in situations that are NOT for OUR highest good. We so don’t want to end things on a bad note. However, sometimes we just need to stop talking and take a step back. I have learned that when I am feeling the need to defend myself to someone it usually means that person is trying to take my power away. I have learned that when I am truly surrounded by loving caring people, even when we disagree, I never feel the need to defend myself. - I don’t like you
It is okay to not like someone. Not liking someone doesn’t necessarily mean that you think they are a bad person. There just may be something about them that doesn’t resonate with you and that IS okay. In fact, there are and will be times when we don’t like ourselves and that is okay too! I have learned the key is to just honor my feelings and trust my intuition. I have also learned that on those days when I don’t like myself all I need to do is be extra gentle and kind with myself. Oh…and here is a really big one…it is okay if everyone doesn’t like us. Double ugh! I think that is something we will all always be working on! - Life takes away the Universes replaces
When I think back to all the things in my life that I desperately tried to hold onto…people, things, situations and on and on. Truth of the matter is the more I tried to hold on the worst things always seemed to get! Then I was forced to let go and then more things were taken away. The crazy thing is once I let go everything shifted! Other people and things and situations started appearing in my life! And they were all AWESOME! I started realizing that whatever gets “taken away” gets replaced by the Universe 10 fold! Now when I feel something is being taken away I still get that “OH NO” feeling (as I am still human). However, now I stop myself and instead I think “WOW I can’t wait to see what the Universe is going to replace that with”!
So as I get ready to celebrate another wonderful year I look forward to more learning and growing and sharing! And most importantly I look forward to sharing with all of you!!!!!!!!!11